Life’s Lessons Part 2

I have had my share of miss in the relationship standpoint. Women have broken my heart at times. I have chased the wrong type of women on more occasions than I care to remember. I have attempted to behave like Tucker Max on a few occasions, but my attempts ended in failures. Anyway, It may or may not be the point. I am going to talk about what I might have learned from some heartbreaks.

There are two Japanese women I dated that resulted in some embarrassing lessons that I learned. I was twenty five years old at the time. I met both Makiko one night on my way to Tokyo. We started dating in the spring of 2005. I thought this relationship had some potential, but I was deluding myself. She was seeing another man beside me, and I found out about it. Needless to say we stopped dating after the episode. During the time we dated, she was having a tough time understanding me. Perhaps my French accent was heavier than I thought, or perhaps I was not meeting her halfway. We were having a tough time understanding each other. She was also hoping that I would stay in Japan for the rest of my life. I had two things going against me, and I only realized it after our relationship ended. It is impossible for a relationship to work when both parties do not understand each other, and when one wants to live elsewhere. There are more lessons to learn from my experiences, but I have not learned them yet. A few month later, I met Ami on a train ride back to Yokosuka. I found her attractive at the time, and I went after her. She was a ballet dancer and a closet drunk. The relationship was quite stressful though from the onset. She first accused me of only trying to get into her pants. One weekend she was going out of town, so she texted me to find my plans for that weekend. I told her that I have no plans. She then told me not go out to a bar or club. I took offense to her instruction, so I told her what I thought. She can asked not go to a club or bar, but she is no position to tell where or when to go or not. It went on for a few months, and there was not a moment we spent she was not having a drink. Eventually she sent me an email breaking up with me. I was devastated, but I carried on with life.

A few years later I met Meredith. She was a red haired woman. She was a pretty liar with low self esteem. We met in Charlotte, NC when I was stationed in Norfolk, Virginia. I tried to have a long distance relationship with her, but we failed. I was at sea for a deployment, and I made efforts to keep the communication channel open. For months things were going well, then all of a sudden radio silence. She stopped replying to my emails. Her best friend at the time gave me a hint that something was afoot. I then gave her the riot act to find out what was going on. She then told me that she met someone. I was not happy to say the least. A month later, her new squeeze tried to cyber bully me. I scared him when I let him know that he get into a fight with me; he will have a tough time getting back on his feet. He got the message, and he never bothered me again. A few month later Meredith discovered she was pregnant. She kept the pregnancy, and gave birth to a son. In hindsight, I realize we were not made for each other. I learned to avoid insecure women.

The last relationship I am going to talk about is the one with the musician. We met on eHarmony (a Dating Website). We started speaking for a few months, then we finally went on a few dates. As thing got further ahead our natures started revealing themselves. She started comparing me to her father, and I started thinking she was slightly neurotic. The comparison to her dad did not offend me, but her temper annoyed me. She also complained that I think too much. I should have known when a girlfriend tells you that you think too much; your relationship is about to die. We broke up after four month, and then we participated a period of agony that ended a few months later.

I have learned a few lessons from some failed relations. Failed relationships come with hilarity. The damage from failed relations actually builds character. I try to have as much fun as possible, and laugh out loud. I still believe there is beauty in relationships, but a couple has to work in order to succeed.

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