Random Thoughts on 11/04/2018

I was born on April 4, 1980 in the small town of Katiola in the Ivory Coast. I lived in the Ivory Coast till the age of fourteen, then I moved the USA. I attended high school and college in the state of North Carolina. I joinde the Navy after college. My first actual duty station was in Yokosuka, Japan. I served there for three years, and I did other things during my time in active duty. Anyway, it is not the point of this post.

I am in my late thirties, and I am still single. I come from a African family, and I live in America. Ideally, my African parents would love to see me married to a “nice African woman” with children. However, it is not the case. I am single for the most part, and I do not see any future change. My parents have tried to set me up with potential “wives”, but it has been to no avail. They have gotten frustrated about it, but it is what it is. One of my aunts started sending pictures of young women she knows in the UK and two English speaking countries of West Africa (Ghana and Nigeria) at the beginning of the year. I ignored her at first, because I was not trying to be offensive. She took my actions as me being indecisive, and she kept on sending me pictures. A few days after my birthday, I decided to put an end to her actions. I basically ask her stop sending pictures of young women. She was wasting her time, because I am interested in getting married. I am not willing to settle for the sake of settling. In the past, my mother would say that I am too aggressive. My mother would say that my aunts meant well. However, as I am getting older; my views are changing. I believe making excuses for someone’s action is rewarding bad behaviour. I learned not to do so when I was in the military, and I decided to have the same approach in my life as well. I am do not enjoy yelling, but I will tell a person the unvarnished truth. I will tell a person how I feel, and I am not worried about hurting the person’s feeling. I lived alone for many years, and I became introspective, and it accentuated my introvert nature. I became a person with boundaries, and I always try to let everyone around me know that I have boundaries early enough. I believe that once someone knows about my boundaries, then it is on the person to behave accordingly. I am very patient with children and teenagers, but I am not patient with adults. I believe adults should know better, and they cannot behave however they please. I basically hold adults to a higher standard, and when they do not meet the standard I hold them to; I let them know.

I would like to live in a perfect world, but the world is not perfect. However, I try not to see things in black and white. I believe the world is full of nuance, and I try to have an open mind instead. However, I can be rigid on occasions, because I am human after all. This is my random thought of the day.

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